btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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