Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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