My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
