it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
