PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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