if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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