I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize