maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
honey bunches of taint.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Randomize
