last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
