why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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