Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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