Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
