Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
