Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
