So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Randomize
