Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
