When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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