You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
