Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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