what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
