So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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