Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
