I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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