So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
