We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
