I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
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