end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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