I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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