my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
