There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
