Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
