either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
