When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
