I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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