Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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