he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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