Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
