sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
