in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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