Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
