I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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