i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Bang-toberfest begins!!
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
