So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Randomize
