I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
