He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize