She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Randomize
