I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
