It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
