i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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