I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
